Im a b*&%$# in the morning....

Im going crazy,have been for the past few days.
Im panicking about everything and anything and worrying at the same time,disgusting combination!Ive been driving Bk up the wall with my endless pouting and sulking and as always Im wondering how he hasn't gone mad himself.Instead of telling me to get lost he's called every night and tried to make me feel better.*blush* Lucky me.
So why am I worried? Im graduating this weekend,my research paper was accepted for the research conference thingy at University which means I have to find funds to attend the conference,prepare for the presentation and prepare a short biography.My graduation has created humungous headaches for me. The shoes my cousin sent aren't here yet and might not get here in time because there was a postal strike in the UK plus she fears the shoe might be too small.Go figure,that would just be friggin fantastic.
I spent the better part of the week running around looking for a dinner dress and again I am reminded why it sucks to be in Africa!!!!Lots of casual clothes here but nothing for special occassions,unless your aim is to look like a beauty pagent contestant.
So I decided ufck it,Ill ho it out (shout out to Amber Rose!) this time and bought a long top that shall serve as my dress for the night,lol,Im shameless!But Ill do it with self respect,I will make sure I dont bend over or sit without my legs being crossed.See?Self respect!
My biggest problem though is my amazingly over inflated expectations.In my head this weekend is supposed to be super duper fantastic! At first I wasn't excited but then I let myself get excited and now Im just worried my expectations won't be met and so far thats the way things seem to be headed.crap! Ah well,Ill find other reasons to celebrate in my life so Ill just try and make the most of it.

[This totally has nothing to do with the post but my cousin keeps talking to me tho I have headphones on and Im clearly busy typing somethin....weird.I say "hmmm" or nod every now and then,lmao!Im evil]

A long walk....

I honestly think we women are mad sometimes or that we need medication for our mood swings.Im beginning to annoy myself.The hormones went crazy on me this morning,woke up in a good mood only to crash an hour later,ugh!And the annoying thing is not even I understand that mood nonsense.I guess that's why when men ask their women what's wrong they always get "nothing" and a shrug in return because honestly we are just as confused as you are.There are times when I'll be close to tears or have a permanent scowl on my face or have something negative to say about everything but have no justification for it whatsoever,none at all!Bk knows how to deal with me when I get like that though.Always makes me smile,unfortunately I couldn't see him today.But I fought back,I decided I wasn't gonna sit around snapping everyones head off for no good reason so I turned off my phone and took a walk and bought myself some chocolate-always works :-)
I actually walked to and from the filling station without accepting lifts from anyone,thas a big deal cz im laaaaazy!!!I decided today was "don't hit on a girl day" so I ignored all the attempts by guys to say hello or stop me,I was on a chocolate mission,lol.
Musically I let Jay-Z's Reasonable Doubt,K'Naans Trabadour and Kid Cudi's Man on the moon keep me company during my walk.Why is it though that even when you have both headphones on people still feel the need to talk to you thwarting any attempt to be antisocial?smh.Annoying.
When I got back home I was happy and calm,could have been a sugar high though,lol.
Excited to get some sleep and wake up tomorrow,the job hunting continues.sigh.
*Yawn!*Off to bed!